“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened. Or which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!" Matthew 7: 7-11
Oh, how easy it is to get discouraged. Even in the best of times, life is hard. There seems to be an endless supply of disappointments, stressful situations, death, disease, heartache and agony in our life and in the lives of those around us. We see chaos, brokenness and sadness everywhere. So we pray. We petition God to make it better.
Please God, give me peace.
Please God, heal my Mom. Please God, rescue my prodigal child.
Please God, restore my marriage. Please God, let me get this job.
Please God, take this from burden from me.
Yet, our loved ones still fall away and our situations don’t seem to change. I really want to write some encouraging words that will bring peace to your heart and ease your mind. A nice pithy statement that you can cling to as walk through the days of heartache and pain that often accompany unanswered prayers. I honestly wish there was a nice mantra that we could recite that would bring answers to our pleas but sometimes answers take time. For me, the only way I have found to walk through times of unanswered prayers is do exactly what Jesus says in these verses. I seek and I knock.
Years ago I found myself in a place a deep sadness concerning a loved one. I prayed continually for change. I knew this change would align with God’s Will and I believed with all my heart that God could and would answer my prayer. But He didn’t or at least it didn’t happen how or when I expected it to happen. As the days continually moved ahead and I could see my heart becoming more and more disillusioned and sad, I knew I needed to change my heart.
I continued to pray for my loved one but I also began to pray for my own heart. I prayed for understanding and wisdom. James 1:5, we are told that God will give us wisdom if we ask. Again, I was placing my trust in God to help but this was a shift from asking God to change another person to asking God to change me. We as believers are given the Holy Spirit within us to empower us to change and become more like Christ. In praying that God would give me understanding, I was praying for perspective change. Changing my heart would change my attitude and would eventually change how I interacted with my loved one.
Beyond asking God to give me wisdom, I began ferociously seeking to find it. I open the Scriptures and I read and studied His words. Within the pages of Scripture, God speaks to us. We hear His heart and we grow in intimacy with Him. Each page we read teaches us more about Him which grows our love for Him and our trust in Him. We meet Jesus and we see the extent of God’s love for us. We are told over and over that He loves us and desires to know us. As I sought to find answers, I found more of God. Again, my perspective changed and I could see a bigger picture. I began to see small answers along the path. God was at work and I could trust that His timing was right and His ways were much better than my own.
There are still moments where I slip back into despondent thinking and this is where I have to remember to knock. This is how I have come to imagine it in my mind. God is in the same place He was when I was abiding with Him and resting in His company. Then for some reason, I get up and leave to go and try to get something done on my own. I struggle and fail and remember. I come back and knock again. He is there waiting and lets me in. He will always open the door and welcome us back to Him. He alone is all-knowing, all-powerful and all-loving and only He is able to work out all things. Again, it is a perspective change on my part. I must relinquish control and understand that only God can change people and circumstances. I need merely to abide in Him and allow Him time to do things His way.
So how do we persist in asking when we hear no response? How do we keep searching when all seems lost? How do we keep knocking when the door remains shut?
Romans 8:28 is a really good verse to cling to when you need to remember that God will work all things out for your good. But earlier in the chapter, verse 6 tells us “The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace.” When we accept Christ as our Lord and Savior, we are given everything necessary to live a God-centered life (2 Peter 1:3). We have the Holy Spirit of God, alive and living within us. In the toughest moments of this life on Earth, the Holy Spirit will help us transform our minds to think God’s way. He will change our perspective. He can give us strength to walk through the unknown and he can give us understanding when the answer is not the answer we want.
Here are a few verses that I have found helpful to memorize and repeat often to my heart:
Be thankful to Him and bless His name. For the Lord is good; His mercy is everlasting. Psalm 100:4-5
Hear me O Lord, for Your loving kindness is good; turn to me according to the multitude of uluYour tender mercies. Psalm 69:16
Be strong and take heart, all you who hope in the Lord. Psalm 31:24
Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, Who does not change like shifting shadows. James 1:17
And this is the confidence that we have toward Him, that if we ask anything according to His will, He will her us. And if we know that He hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have the requests that we ask of Him. I John 5: 14-15
Ask and you will receive and your joy will be complete. John 16:24
”…you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you,” declares the Lord. Jeremiah 29:12-14
Be strong and let your heart take courage, all who wait upon the Lord. Psalm 31:24
The lesson of the withered tree in Mark 11
The parable of the widow and the judge in Luke 11
Paul’s thorn in 2 Corinthians 12